Happy Tuesday!

Posted: February 1, 2011 in Custody Advice, Rants and Raves

Well, so far the storm hasn’t hit, but people keep saying we’re expecting nearly two feet of snow. We’ve gotten a little bit, but nothing major so far. The kids were disappointed to see clear streets and open schools this morning. My teenage son tried conning me into calling the kids in today, saying that the snow was going to hit while they were in school and it wouldn’t be safe to go get them and drive them home. Nice try lol.

On another note, I had a long conversation with my husband’s ex-wife the other day. She was explaining how she thought it wasn’t fair that she was being judged as a parent. It went something like, “With what your family does, how can you judge me as a person?” I calmly explained that business life and raising kids are two different things and that when you are a parent, your kids need to come first and you have to avoid the wrong people and the wrong situations to keep those kids safe. Surprisingly, she saw my point. As I stated, she has agreed to go to counseling. She still doesn’t think she has a drinking problem. Honestly, I don’t care if she drinks as long as she doesn’t do it around my step-kids and the decisions she makes because of her drinking don’t affect them. However, that has not been the case in the past and hopefully she will see this and change her actions in the future.

One part of the conversation did give me hope. We discussed the night that she left at five or seven in the evening (I hear two different stories) and told the kids she’d be back in a couple of hours and didn’t actually show up till three AM. I asked her if she would do things differently if she had to do it all over again. She said that she would. I have to say, this is the first time I have talked to her about these issues without her becoming completely defensive and it gives me hope that she can provide her children with the love and support they need. No parent is perfect but certain things are completely unacceptable. If she can learn this, it will make everyone’s life so much easier.

I am also happy to say that she finally seems to realize that her children are suffering some serious emotional issues due to the things they have experienced. At first she wanted to blame it on them being uprooted and moving out here but when I pointed out that these issues were present long before they came to live with me she really couldn’t argue that fact. I was really worried about her not understanding just how important it was that these kids get the help they need, but she seems to be realizing how serious this is.

Don’t get me wrong. I don’t think this woman is going to become the perfect mother overnight. I do think, however, that she realizes that she needs to make some serious changes and that the realization has finally dawned on her that her actions have hurt her children in the past. It’s definitely a step in the right direction.

  1. Maggie says:

    I’m glad to hear that it seems like your stepkids’ mom is coming around… here’s hoping for further good news in the future. 🙂

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