Where’s the Damn Car?

Posted: February 2, 2012 in Misc

That is the very question I asked myself when I got out of the oral surgeon’s office this morning. It appears that Mr. BPD (who had to drive me because I was going to be on the gas) decided my oral surgery was taking to long and just left. Didn’t tell anyone. Just left. Why? Because he’s a lunatic asshole.

So I text him and tell him I’m done and he needs to come get me. His response? “Fuck you.” Hello cab driver. Should’ve arranged for a cab in the first place since this jackass is as about as reliable as a Yugo.

When I finally do make my way home I am barraged by an insult assault. He not only insults me, he insults my kids (to me, not them) and everyone in my family (except for my grandparents because they would just have him killed).

Not really in the mood, I took some pain killers and some Klonpin and laid down. At least I was able to vent to someone.

He left for work about two hours after I laid down and about two hours after that I get a text asking if I’m okay — from him. Like he really gives a flying fuck whether or not I’m okay.

Then I get another text saying he’s sorry and he loves me. Is this love? I’m sorry, my definition of love does not include leaving your God damned wife at the oral surgeon because you have anger management issues.

Then, of all things, he has the audacity to text me and ask me if I’m mad. I’m not even responding to his texts at this point. Am I mad? Mad is not the word for it. I used to get mad when I cared about him. I’m disgusted. I’m fed up. I’m glad I had the self-restraint to not kick him in the junk. Not because he’s an ass, but because he took MY car and left me stranded.

And this is how it ALWAYS is. He does something like this and then acts like a kicked puppy who doesn’t know what he did wrong. Welcome to the world of high-functioning BPD. He knows EXACTLY what he did. He had complete control over his actions. He just refuses to take accountability, like a toddler.

I’m fed up, I’m frustrated and I just want this shit done and over with. In my mind, he’s not my husband anymore. He’s a temporary problem that needs to be fixed.

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